Valuable Perspective
“The world owes you nothing. It was here first.” –Mark Twain
A colleague of mine used to live in Port Rupert, British Columbia. He still has many good friends there. About a year ago he told me of one such friend of his who was living there with her husband and her young daughter. He explained to me that she had an appointment with a specialist down the coast in Vancouver. She had been feeling unwell for quite some time and after a battery of tests she was hoping they could finally tell her the cause of her decline in health. Her husband and daughter had accompanied her on the long trip down the coast. Unfortunately, she was given some pretty grave news. She had stage four cancer and there was no chance for a cure. They gave her less than a year to live. Stunned by this brutal revelation, the three of them shuffled into their car and set off up the coast for the long ride home.
My colleague further explained to me that his friend was lying down in the back and her husband and daughter were seated in the front of the vehicle. Unfortunately, the road was treacherous that day and her husband lost control of the car. It careened off the highway and into the ocean. In a chaotic instant she was struggling to get free of the vehicle before it sank completely beneath the icy waves. Sadly, she found herself alone on the shore. In less than one day she had lost her entire family and any hope for her future. Personally, I do not know how she could carry on. This is simply the most tragic tale that I have ever heard in my life. The other day, my co-worker informed me that his friend finally lost her battle with cancer. I do not know her name or how she lived her remaining time but her terrible tale haunts me.
I struggle to find anything meaningful or positive from this one person’s tragic nightmare. It reminds me of Bill Murray’s remarkable but painful insight at the end of the film The Razor’s Edge, “When Piedmont died, I had to pay him back for my life. I found out there's another debt to pay — for the privilege of being alive. I thought Sophie was my reward for trying to live a good life. Uh uh. There is no payoff — not now.” We all so terribly want our payoffs in this life, but that is a very unfair expectation of this world. The truth is that we hold this foolish expectation because we live amidst the abundant privileges of the first world. Those of poorer nations hold no such illusions about how harsh and unfair reality can be.
I am not seeking to be maudlin. As terrible as the events I described were they did provide that woman with at least one remarkable opportunity. In one day she was stripped of all the fallacies that we so often cling to throughout our lives. She could not deny her mortality any longer and she saw the futility of seeking direct rewards through this life itself. To paraphrase Bill Murray, she completely understood the debt to pay for the privilege of being alive. That is not a lesson learned by many, yet it can be invaluable to those who get it. It crystalizes our priorities and burns away pettiness. Here was a woman with absolutely nothing to lose in life… she had already lost it all.
This tale provides me is perspective and priority. From it I realize that this life owes us nothing, absolutely nothing. We are privileged to be on this journey no matter how long and pleasant or short and brutal it may be. It is what we choose to do with the time that we have that gives real meaning to our lives. As to priorities, it reminds me that we truly have no time for trivial pettiness. How small do my problems seem in comparison to those that this woman faced in her short remaining days. How can I waste my time in foolish worry and self-doubt? I see the vital importance of remaining here and now and addressing the priorities in this very moment. This woman’s life urges me to be bold because I too can lose everything that I cherish in an instant. I clearly see the fleeting nature of all physical things and the permanent and transcendent nature love and its actions.
Yes, I told you a tragic tale, full of sorrow and woe. You can casually dismiss it as just someone else’s random misfortune and go on your merry way. However, I hope that, like myself, you can use this harsh reality to splash some cold water on your soul and awaken it to that which is truly important here and now. We can realize that if we should live long enough then we will ultimately face these very same circumstances stretched across a longer period of time. It simply makes sense to learn from this condensed life lesson and if we can avoid turning away from it then this ugly dark reality can actually provide us a wonderful and valuable perspective.
©2018 Scott D. Wilson
