Why are you here?

Why are you here?

©2015 Scott D. Wilson,P.Eng.

 

Seriously, why are you here?  What is the point of your travels in this outer spiral arm of a Galaxy we call the Milky Way?  Sure, you were born here but that is mere circumstance.  Why do continue this ongoing adventure?  Are you like singer in the old Peggy Lee song “Is that all there is?” who is just hanging in because they simply don’t want to face the final disappointment of death?  Do you breathe out of habit or do you savour every miraculous heartbeat and every taste of life-sustaining air?

I see so many, day in and day out, struggling with addictions, bad habits, weight, and so much more.  The common factor for so many of them is the need for motivation and the will to follow through.  I may be wrong but I see that a large part of their problem is that they lack meaningful purpose in their life.  They simply do not know why they are here.  It is as if they expect to wake up one day from this tired existence and start living their real lives – the lives they were meant to be living.  This may in fact be partially true.

I can see why the Eastern religions and mysticism seek ‘enlightenment’ and ‘awakening.’  Like Neo in ‘The Matrix’ they want to see reality as it truly is and realize that their true identity is not what they have accepted since birth.  They want to awaken and see their true selves and those of the people and creations around them.  This is a noble quest.  It sets a foundation and provides a perspective for all that we are and all that we do.  For until you begin to truly understand yourself and start to know why you are here then you will continually struggle with motivation and willpower for all other pursuits.

For example, if you do not have a core purpose for living then what does it matter if you are thin or fat, healthy or sick, sane or crazy, wise or foolish?  Finding a purpose for life is not purely a spiritual pursuit.  Atheists are not immune to the need for a purposeful existence.  The only difference is the basis for the rational understanding of their unique purpose.

You are a combination of a rather unique set of 3.2 billion base pairs of DNA.  Scientifically and spiritually, you shall not pass this way again.  Even a clone will technically not be you, as it would be constrained to experience a completely different time and set of circumstances.   You belong here… to this time and place.  Accept that the universe has placed you where and when you are.  Whether it be the forces of evolution and circumstance or by divine intent, you came to be here today.

Accepting your place within time and space will allow you to look clearly at yourself and ask what role are you suited to play in the portion that has been allotted to you.  What are your talents?  What are your passions and interests?  What makes you come alive?  If these things are taking a back seat in your life then I suggest that you look at your priorities.  Because if you are not doing the things that bring enjoyment, meaning and fulfillment to your life then you won’t find much motivation to do all the other things that would otherwise bring health and other benefits to your existence.

Do not look to others to find out why you exist.  Their truths and meanings may have no bearing on you whatsoever.  Look inside and learn.  Look outside and see the possibilities, not the limitations.  Trust that you have been provided with a rational mind that can discover your own unique reasonable purpose.  Do not accept the realities that others have provided for you; they can limit your ability to see and understand.  When you are confused by life allow yourself to be puzzled and to ask “Why?”  Allow for awe and wonder. 

If you are having difficulties finding some kind of motivation I suggest that you put aside that struggle for now and instead ask yourself “Who am I?” Quietly allow the infinite number of answers to come to you.  Some will resonate more than others.  Dwell on those for they will help you to discover who you are and why you are here.  It will be a process.  Just as one does not go one day from a classroom to the pilot seat of an aircraft so too will the learning about yourself take gentle time and patience.  

I encourage you to discover your own reason for your existence.  From that answer will spring the ability and motivation for so much more.  Howard Thurman put it so eloquently:

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” 

I ask again, “Why are you here?”  I have provided some perspective and advice for one to begin to find an answer to this question.  Now I lastly ask, are you brave enough to try? 

Filled with "I Can"

Filled with “I Can”

©2015 Scott D. Wilson, P.Eng.

This world we live in is marvelous and inspiring but it is also draining. Day to day labour is frequently both physically and mentally taxing. This life rarely offers back many ‘atta-boys’ for the efforts that we put into it. This simple reality is seems immutable and eternal. So how then do we continue to press on and remain focused on goals that better us and our surroundings? What keeps us fixed on our target?

Success is about attaining sought after objectives. Success is about achieving. Part of what stops us in our quests it the ‘I can’ts.’ We get stuck focusing on our limitations. We fail to see what we can do because we are looking at what we cannot do. This in itself is a tragedy of our culture and our upbringing.

When we bring children into the world they perceive it as a place filled with infinite possibilities, and rightly so. They are filled with ‘I cans.’ It is one of our jobs as parents and as a society to expose our children to as many experiences as we can that will test their potential and expand their horizons. We are to encourage them in their many pursuits and in interests as much as we are able. In short, we need to let them play with their possible ‘cans’ and allow them to discover their potential. But alas, this is often not the case. All too soon children are faced with an enormous number of ‘can’ts’ – some real but many others virtual or imposed.

Certainly physical age and immaturity place limitations on a child’s abilities. Likewise economic status and geographic considerations also curtail certain possibilities. However, those are not the boundaries that I am speaking about. It is the more subtle ‘can’ts’ that drain us and prevent us from pursuing dreams and exploring possibilities. We have all heard them…

• You can’t make money at that.
• Nobody has done that before.
• I don’t think that can be done.
• I doubt that *you* can change that.
• It has always been that way.
• No one really needs that.
• Only a *lucky* few can do that.
• It’s too hard.
• That’s impossible.
• It’s ok, nobody does that any way.

We whisper these worldly lies primarily with the aim of sparing the child the pain of failure and disappointment. We do not want them to suffer. We are focused on their pragmatic material welfare. We want them to prosper in the material world because the material world is where we exist. We don’t want them to put their economic lives at risk. We want them to take the safe path. And there is nothing wrong with that. The safe paths lead to relatively nice jobs and decent lives. They serve the majority of mankind quite well.

However, are these safe paths the ones that will lead to humanity’s success? Is it fair to teach our offspring to be risk averse? A safety net is a good thing, but it would be a boring circus if we saw all the performers lounging in it. We encourage people to risk love because we intuitively know the stagnant consequence of locking our hearts away and never feeling the pain of a failed love. Yet we fill ourselves and those around us with ‘can’ts’ instead of ‘cans’ because we cannot fathom the consequences. On the whole, we do not encourage people to aim high. Soon the ‘you can’ts’ of others become our own internal ‘I can’ts.’

Today, I want to change that. Look inward. What dreams have you suppressed because of ‘can’ts’ that came from both yourself and others? For a moment suspend your disbelief in yourself. Do not look at what you perceive to be your inabilities. Look towards your ‘I cans.’ Start filling yourself up with them. Here are a few to start:

• You can choose a different way.
• You can risk.
• You can choose to change.
• You can let go of the past.
• You can stop.
• You can begin.
• You can create.
• You can learn.
• You can forgive.
• You can accept yourself.
• You can dream.
• You can dance.
• You can love.

Keep going. If you are honest you will realize that you are full of potential ‘I cans.’ There are far more ‘cans’ than ‘can’ts’ within us but we need to see them and we need to realize them. Today is your day to start. Take the time to start listing your ‘I cans’ and come to see the possible paths before you that you never considered – and start acting on them! As a bonus, begin helping others to find their ‘I cans’ and in the process you will learn some new ones about yourself!

You Belong Here

You Belong Here

©Scott D. Wilson,P.Eng. 2015

 

It would seem that one of mankind’s fundamental drives is the search for acceptance and belonging.   Whether atheist, agnostic or a person of faith, we all seem to seek a sense of purpose and understanding why we exist.  

I am here to state that regardless of faith that you belong here and now.  The universe, the Creator, the first Cause or whatever you conceive has conspired to place you in this time and place.  So many regret their past but fail to realize that their failures have shaped them as much as their successes.  Without pain joy does not taste quite so sweet.  Learning what you don’t want is just as important as learning your passion.  In eastern culture there is a saying “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”

You are here now and reading these words because your life has brought you here.  I encourage you to make the best of this opportunity… become the ready student and anticipate your teacher(s).  I believe that part of our drive for belong stirs from our innate desire to be creative.  We humans tend to create that on which we focus our thoughts.  Artists see art in the world around them and become drawn to make it tangible to others.  Engineers see technical needs in the world and create solutions to address them.  Accountants see elegance in economics and seek novel ways to use money and benefit from it. 

If you find your thoughts focused on your deficits then you will inevitably create more deficits.  If you find yourself focused on your weight then it will tend to increase.  Mother Teresa once said “I was once asked why I don't participate in anti-war demonstrations. I said that I will never do that, but as soon as you have a pro-peace rally, I'll be there.”  She understood this principle.  Most people truly do not want to lose weight; they want to be healthy.  Our health and wellbeing should be our focus, not our weight!  Our focus should be on our riches, not on our poverty or our debts.  

So I return again to my original premise. You do not lack belonging or acceptance.  It was here all along.  You belong here.  Forgive your past self, they were doing their best with what they knew and what they had at that time.  They were younger and less wise.  Accept that you are meant to be here and that you bring something unique with your specific set of 3.2 billion base pairs of DNA.  This is your time.  Open yourself to learning.  Open yourself to the almost limitless possibilities for your life.  Learn yourself and learn your purpose… then face your fears and follow it!

“You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.” – Max Ehrmann (The Desiderata)