Shedding Disbelief

Shedding Disbelief

By Scott Wilson

 

“Close your eyes and imagine the best version of you possible.That’s who you are, let go of any part of you that doesn’t believe it.” –Chris Assaad

 

Virtually every successful person that I have ever studied operated by the principle in the words above.  They had a vision for themselves and who they intended to become.  Every day they would wake up and bring to mind a vision of the person into which they planned to transform themselves.  Yes, they might not be there yet.  Yes, there may still be a long way to go.  However, they used this vision to direct their actions, decisions and interactions so that they would keep moving closer to that version of themselves.

They could see themselves at the endpoint.  The envisioned how they would be and behave in that successful state.  They acted as is if they were already there. These people needed to let go of the parts of themselves that did not harmonize with their planned goal for who they were becoming.  They needed to believe in themselves.  I imagine that this belief was the truly the heart of their battles more so than any of the external struggles that they faced.

No matter what our goals may be, the difficulties that we face in the real world will pale in comparison to the battles waged inside of us.  We love to blame external factors for our troubles.  Our friends, families, colleagues and people in general thwart our efforts to reach our goals.  Circumstances beyond our control turn against us without warning.  Even our own bodies and health can betray us.  However, if we are truly honest with ourselves then in the end we will see that these are just mere excuses.

They are excuses to give up on ourselves and our dreams.  

They are the siren song of mediocrity and disillusion.  So many say “Life handed me crappy cards so I am just going to fold.” They actually die long before death takes them.  So many who succeeded before us overcame life situations that would make our lives look luxurious in comparison.  They did not succeed because they were lucky or blessed or special.  They overcame because they chose to continue believing in themselves.  They fought hard and stopped disbelieving themselves.  They fought hard against their own excuses.

If you see a successful person today I guarantee that they succeeded in their heart and their mind long before they overcame all the difficulties that you and I can see.  They practiced the words of Chris Assaad.  If we are serious about pursuing our own dreams then we too must work to shed the disbelieving parts of ourselves.  We must see our excuses for the deadly and dangerous things that they are and let them go.  Let us instead imagine that best version of ourselves and start believing and being it.

Cheers!

P.S.  As I read this quote and write this, I confess, I am struggling it.  I want to be the best version of myself.  I want that vision to be my core.  As much as my head can agree with this, my emotions are brutally fighting it and they are strong.  Yet fight I will!  If I can wrestle with these demons then so can you!  William Ross Wallace said “Every man dies.  Not everyone really lives.” I don’t know about you but I intend to LIVE before I die!

 

Huzzah!

©2017S.D.Wilson

What Are You Waiting For?

What Are You Waiting For?

“I will act now. I will act now. I will act now.

Henceforth, I will repeat these words

each hour, each day, every day,

until the words become

as much a habit as my breathing,

and the action which follows becomes

as instinctive as the blinking of my eyelids.

With these words I can condition my mind

to perform every action necessary

for my success.I will act now.” – Og Mandino

Tomorrow, it is the curse of mankind. Tomorrow is a thief – a con man! We foolishly give it our dreams, our goals and our hopes, and it gives us nothing in return. We always think the cheque is in the mail. We always naïvely believe that tomorrow will come and bring us our reward. A better day is always on the horizon. Instead, today we receive the bills for the unpaid efforts of yesterday. It is far too easy to live in the mediocre satisfaction of today. We need to become uncomfortable now!

In our discomfort we can see what we are sowing. We can know the results before they come. We can choose a different path before the road that we are on becomes a one-way street. We can beat tomorrow by winning the game today! We can stop putting off what we know is needed. We can stop thinking and start doing. Tomorrow will enlist fear to stand in our way… to block our path with visions of failure and disaster. It will soothe us with the luring promise that circumstances might be more favorable later.

Plug your ears against its numbing siren song! Face fear head on! Arm yourself with your passions and your love. Pick up the sword of self-esteem and cut a path forward through the underbrush of procrastination one small stroke at a time. Health will be yours! Success will be yours! Prosperity will be yours! Life will be yours! Take back the hopes and dreams from tomorrow and start building them today. Act now.

Are you waiting for tomorrow to deliver on its promises?  Don’t be fooled; stop waiting for the scam artist. Instead, spend your precious time wisely.  Heed the victory call, “Act now. Act now. Act NOW!”  Become impatient. Squeeze the best out of today. Drain this moment of all its potential. Act like tomorrow may never come. Chase all regrets from today.

What are you waiting for? The time for in action and waiting has passed.  If you truly want success then the time to act is now.  If you want results then you need to make their cause happen at this time.  Make this day your day.  Let us abandon tomorrow and its empty promises. No more accidents.  Live your life on purpose.  Know that all you crave lies behind your fears – so face them with ferocity! Lay hold of your birthright… your authentic self and a genuine life!

Huzzah!
©2017 Scott D. Wilson

Finding Success

Finding Success 

©2015 Scott D. Wilson

This article is dedicated to the admirable life and great friendship of Dr. Janice McCarthy.
I do not know when exactly but I do know that soon a light will fade from this planet and the universe will be a bit darker. My friend, Doctor Janice McCarthy is in the final stages of her battle with the evil that is cancer. My heart breaks for her husband and children and their unfair loss.


But I am not writing here about loss. I am writing about finding success. I do not know a single person who does not crave success in their life. It is almost a fundamental human drive like hunger, sex, love and acceptance. However, we all seem to achieve varying levels of success in our lives. We all want and dream of success yet few of us are willing to do all that is needed to achieve those goals. I believe that the drive for success is akin to psychologist Abraham Maslow's description of the quest for self-actualization.


I am privileged to have known several successful people in my passage through this weary land of heartaches and broken dreams. Some were wealthy.  Others had meager means. Some were well known and popular. While some live in quiet obscurity. There were those both brilliant and simple. I would imagine that many reading here wonder then how I am defining success.


Earl Nightingale gave the best definition of success that I am aware of to date.  His definition stated that "Success is the progressive realization of a worthy ideal."  In most people's eyes worthy ideals are mainly fame and fortune. I have a much broader view of success yet I would have to say that still only a few obtain it.


My successful few have one common thread: a fearless passion for life. Their legacies are loving families, heartfelt friends, admiring colleagues, grateful neighbours and a general respect from virtually all who knew them. Whatever their circumstance they grabbed life for all it was worth. None of them were victims in their maturity. Their environments did not subdue or define them. They truly overcame the world and themselves.  Oh, they had fears and nightmares but they all learned to face them to persevere beyond them.

My friend Janice is not dying of cancer. She is truly living deeply and fully with the disease. Despite the ravages of the illness she seems more alive now than when we first met. Yes, I see a certain sadness within her but it is not regret.  It is the natural yearning for more. Her smile, her wit, her impish ways, her unconquered spirit burn brightly. Even in the precious last days she still reaches out and counsels her patients. Her abundant generosity has not been stemmed by this vicious disease.  I see in her the unbowed unbroken warrior.  I cannot help but be inspired.


Why is this success?  She has lived this life on her terms. That is one of the noblest ideals that I can envision. The lives she has touched attest to this. Of this I have no doubt. Her family and friends have been given a shining legacy from her. I will miss my friend but I will forever be enriched by my time spent with her.


And so I encourage you, my reader, to look to your own life. Find your own success and commit your life to it. Use the inspirations of lives well lived to find your own noble ideals. Do not narrow success to money or popularity. Define life on your own terms. Dream big and work hard. Love deeply and boldly!  Do not let world extinguish your light. Burn brightly like a shooting star... like my friend Janice.

"To laugh often and love much; to win the respect of intelligent persons and the affection of children; to earn the approbation of honest citizens and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give of one’s self; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived—this is to have succeeded."- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Fill a Need

Fill a Need

©2015 Scott D. Wilson
 

I want to tell you two remarkable stories.  The first story is that of a young intern back in 1991.  Like many of her ilk she works hard and long hours striving to learn all that she can to become a superb physician and ultimately a skilled surgeon.  During this time she is assigned to a critical care ward where she encounters and elderly patient whose illness is very likely terminal.  They chat and find a common bond in their passion for fly fishing.  Their relationship is limited to the regular brief encounters during the young physician’s daily rounds. 
 
One day the doctor notes that the patient’s demeanor is more subdued.  Her inquiry yields a heart-felt statement from the patient.  Tomorrow is his wedding anniversary.  For all of the 60+ years that he has been married he has never missed a wedding anniversary.  But now he is stuck in this bed unable to do anything for his beloved.  Saying nothing our diligent doctor politely takes her leave and moves on.
 
The next day, shortly after the elderly patient’s wife arrives for her regular visit a large bouquet of flowers is delivered to her under her husband’s name.  Our physician hears the joyful tale from her patient later that day.  With a tired smile she goes on her way.
 
My next story is that of another new physician.  However this lady is not so young.  For you see, she was first a nurse for several years before she decided to become a doctor.  This tale begins on a night shift.  A rookie nurse is working the palliative care floor.  The ink is barely dry on her certificate.  Our new physician is also on duty performing rounds when the frantic young nurse stops her in the hall.  An elderly patient is in the last stages of dying.  He has no family to comfort him in his last hours.  He is moaning and begging the young nurse for someone to just hold him.  This is our fledgling nurse’s first encounter with a dying patient.  She desperately looks to our physician for direction.
 
Without a word the fresh doctor quickly walks towards the patient’s room.  Then, to the astonishment of the novice nurse, the doctor careful climbs onto the bed and gently wraps her arms around the dying man.  And there in the room our nurse and doctor remain for several small hours till the old man passes from this world.  The impact on the nurse was significant.  She had never before experienced the likes of such a doctor.
 
Why do I spin these tales for you?  Because they a real, and because I see a lesson of success in their actions.  I am privileged to call the first doctor my sister.  The second wonderful healer is the daughter of my mother’s best friend.  In both cases these wonderful women saw a need and compassionately filled it.  They did not seek glory or recognition.  Indeed I would not know of them had they not been relayed to me by third parties.  Despite their authority and positions they did not feel these tasks were beneath them. 
 
In Disney’s film ‘Robots’ the protagonist falls in love with the catchphrase “See a need. Fill a need.”  The idea is that if we identify a problem then we are in probability also the person most able to develop the solution.  In the film the character’s desire to follow this ideal leads him on the path to success. The two ladies above perfectly lived this creed.  Their examples challenge me.  As I consider the most successful people in business and in life I realize that they too exemplified this truth.  Mother Theresa, Bill Gates, Alexander Graham Bell,  Nicolai Tesla, and others… they all saw needs and successfully filled them.  If we are to succeed in this life then we too should follow this pattern.
 
We all have unique talents and abilities.  We all look around and see this world’s many deficiencies.  Today, instead of hoping that someone else will fix them, perhaps we can turn it around and consider how we might be the necessary person to bless this needy world.  Like my two doctors, may we find our own way to quietly “fill a need.” 

Filled with "I Can"

Filled with “I Can”

©2015 Scott D. Wilson, P.Eng.

This world we live in is marvelous and inspiring but it is also draining. Day to day labour is frequently both physically and mentally taxing. This life rarely offers back many ‘atta-boys’ for the efforts that we put into it. This simple reality is seems immutable and eternal. So how then do we continue to press on and remain focused on goals that better us and our surroundings? What keeps us fixed on our target?

Success is about attaining sought after objectives. Success is about achieving. Part of what stops us in our quests it the ‘I can’ts.’ We get stuck focusing on our limitations. We fail to see what we can do because we are looking at what we cannot do. This in itself is a tragedy of our culture and our upbringing.

When we bring children into the world they perceive it as a place filled with infinite possibilities, and rightly so. They are filled with ‘I cans.’ It is one of our jobs as parents and as a society to expose our children to as many experiences as we can that will test their potential and expand their horizons. We are to encourage them in their many pursuits and in interests as much as we are able. In short, we need to let them play with their possible ‘cans’ and allow them to discover their potential. But alas, this is often not the case. All too soon children are faced with an enormous number of ‘can’ts’ – some real but many others virtual or imposed.

Certainly physical age and immaturity place limitations on a child’s abilities. Likewise economic status and geographic considerations also curtail certain possibilities. However, those are not the boundaries that I am speaking about. It is the more subtle ‘can’ts’ that drain us and prevent us from pursuing dreams and exploring possibilities. We have all heard them…

• You can’t make money at that.
• Nobody has done that before.
• I don’t think that can be done.
• I doubt that *you* can change that.
• It has always been that way.
• No one really needs that.
• Only a *lucky* few can do that.
• It’s too hard.
• That’s impossible.
• It’s ok, nobody does that any way.

We whisper these worldly lies primarily with the aim of sparing the child the pain of failure and disappointment. We do not want them to suffer. We are focused on their pragmatic material welfare. We want them to prosper in the material world because the material world is where we exist. We don’t want them to put their economic lives at risk. We want them to take the safe path. And there is nothing wrong with that. The safe paths lead to relatively nice jobs and decent lives. They serve the majority of mankind quite well.

However, are these safe paths the ones that will lead to humanity’s success? Is it fair to teach our offspring to be risk averse? A safety net is a good thing, but it would be a boring circus if we saw all the performers lounging in it. We encourage people to risk love because we intuitively know the stagnant consequence of locking our hearts away and never feeling the pain of a failed love. Yet we fill ourselves and those around us with ‘can’ts’ instead of ‘cans’ because we cannot fathom the consequences. On the whole, we do not encourage people to aim high. Soon the ‘you can’ts’ of others become our own internal ‘I can’ts.’

Today, I want to change that. Look inward. What dreams have you suppressed because of ‘can’ts’ that came from both yourself and others? For a moment suspend your disbelief in yourself. Do not look at what you perceive to be your inabilities. Look towards your ‘I cans.’ Start filling yourself up with them. Here are a few to start:

• You can choose a different way.
• You can risk.
• You can choose to change.
• You can let go of the past.
• You can stop.
• You can begin.
• You can create.
• You can learn.
• You can forgive.
• You can accept yourself.
• You can dream.
• You can dance.
• You can love.

Keep going. If you are honest you will realize that you are full of potential ‘I cans.’ There are far more ‘cans’ than ‘can’ts’ within us but we need to see them and we need to realize them. Today is your day to start. Take the time to start listing your ‘I cans’ and come to see the possible paths before you that you never considered – and start acting on them! As a bonus, begin helping others to find their ‘I cans’ and in the process you will learn some new ones about yourself!