Conserve your energy!

Conserve your energy!
©Scott D. Wilson 2014

Daily we are told that we must conserve our limited resources. We are asked to reduce reuse and recycle. This makes sense. Our physical wealth is finite and once we burn or use it up then it is gone.  If we  are not wasteful then we can make the best use of what we have.

As individuals, the principle of conservation holds equally true. We need to use our assets wisely if we intend to succeed. It only makes sense to carefully apply our energies so that we have the power reach our goals. We are human. Each day grants us only so much time and energy. These are non-renewable. You cannot get back one wasted moment of time. So I urge you to act wisely and conserve your energy now. How can we do this?  Of course, I have some suggestions.

Let go of regrets. Regrets tie us to past failures and mistakes.  Regrets steal our power today and prevent us from moving forward. Regrets force us to look backwards yet they cloud honest reflection and impede us from learning anything constructive from the past.  Free yourself from the tyrant of regrets.  See each regret for the anchor that it is and let it go.

Don't let anxiety rob you of this moment. Of course, we must plan and prepare for the future.  However, our fear and worry do not serve to move us towards the goals that we desire. Anxiety takes our energy right now and uses it to dread possibilities and events that may never occur. See fear for the robber that it is and learn to let go of foolish worries.

Do not waste time and effort trying to control or change others.  This is a waste of your precious resources. Instead, use your time and energy to master self-control. We truly cannot change others nor control their actions.  However, if learn to control ourselves then we improve our ability to help and influence those around us.

Do not let the words of others drain you. If we let take it to heart then criticism can sap us of motivation and satisfaction. Instead, criticism can be used for learning. Listen carefully to critics and look for any truth in their statements.  Don't use that truth as a hammer on your ego, but rather use the information to improve yourself and #ç your strengths and weaknesses. As for the rest of their criticism, reject it and let it go.

Similarly, do not use your own thoughts self-destructively. Do not berate yourself hoping to kick yourself to do better. This does not work and it generally erodes our self-esteem and steals our motivation. Focus the energy of your thoughts on self-improvement instead. Take inventory of your strengths and seek to understand your weaknesses. You can build on your strengths and you can find methods to compensate or mitigate your weaknesses. Use your mind's energy to strive towards your goals. Remain creative, not destructive.

Never permit yourself the extravagance of hatred. Hatred wastes time and emotion on others. Your hatred has absolutely no effect on the person or thing that you detest. They move through life blissful unaware and unaltered by your anger.  There is an old proverb that says "Hatred is like drinking poison and hoping that the other person will die."  Save your energy and selfishly forgive.  Forgiveness frees you from the unhealthy obsession with the object of your venom.  Forgiveness does not mean being a doormat to abusive people or circumstances. It simply means letting go of the pain and then standing up for what is right.

Focus on today and its goals. Stay in this moment. Conserve your energies so that you may attain the success for which you strive. Stop wasting your efforts on regret, anxiety, others, criticism, self-loathing and hatred. Use the time, emotions and energy that you have right now to constructively build the tomorrows that you passionately desire!!

Decide! The Deadly Culture of Indecision

Decide! The Deadly Culture of Indecision
©2015 Scott D. Wilson, P.Eng.

“Only when a decision is made and a commitment to action occurs does any real change ever happen.” –SDW

The successful lead. That is a given fact. One phrase often associated with leadership is "a man of action." There is good rean for this association. Good leaders do not waffle or wait to seek consensus. When a faced with a choice they decide and then take action to follow through. That is how they get results. Success is about getting results. Indecision is crippling to leadership.

We are living in a culture of indecision.  We think that making no decision is safer than making the wrong one.  That is a deadly mistake.  Making the correct decision yields good results and we move on.  Making an incorrect decision yields poor results and we face the opportunity to change course and improve. Making no decision yields something and if that thing is good we try to take credit and if it is poor we hold on to deniability because we didn’t make the decision.  This is the mindset of a victim, not a victor. It is certainly not leadership nor is it conducive to any form of success.  Making no decision is actually making the decision not to decide and that can be deadly.

Imagine if an emergency room physician used such a mindset.  Patients would quickly start dying.  Fear of the wrong decision is not an option.  The doctor must choose and work with the results.  If we are to grow and improve then we face the same scenario.  Fear of the wrong choice is no excuse for not making a decision when one is required.  Indecision denies our power.  Indecision doubts our talents and abilities. Indecision withdraws. Only a decision and the commitment to act on it advances forward.

There is a Zen proverb that goes “When you sit, sit. When you stand, stand. Above all, don't wobble.” In martial arts we call this wobbling state being ‘double-weighted.’  A fighter who is double-weighted is vulnerable because their indecision in the face of an opponent has placed them in an unbalanced condition.  If their weight was on one leg or the other then they could seek to advance or withdraw, attack or defend.  In the double-weighted state they are prone to attack and vulnerable to being toppled.  Our poor fighter needs to decide and act in order to correct his situation. Decision must be linked with the commitment to act for it to be effective. An empty decision is no better than indecision.

Is life advancing on you like an opponent and demanding a decision?  Are there areas of your journey were you are faced with a choice on the path?  Do not let indecision rob you of your victory or stop you dead.  In life’s voyage, sitting down at the cross-roads is not truly an option.  Recognize the need for a choice. Believe in yourself and your wisdom to choose.  Make the decision.  Commit to action. Move forward and grow from the experience.

Know that you are the only one stopping yourself.

Know who you are!

Know who you are!

©2015 Scott D. Wilson

High on the side of Mount Parnassus sits the Temple of Apollo and Oracle of Delphi.  Prominently inscribed on the temple walls are the many Delphic maxim.  Among the most famous of these proverbs by far is this one:

γνῶθι σεαυτόν

In ancient Greek it reads "Gnothi seauton" which translates simply to "Know thyself."  Great philosophers and thinkers through the ages have pondered and expounded upon this aphorism.  It seems like such a trite statement: Know yourself.  I mean honestly, we spend twenty-four hours a day with ourselves from cradle to grave.  One would think that we would get to know ourselves pretty well during that time so why bother advising us all to do so?  Surprising, I do think this is often the case.  It has been my experience that we do not tend to pay attention to the commonplace things in our lives.

Unless we come to the point that we are gasping for breath we rarely pay attention to the air that surrounds us.  Until we have been significantly deprived of nourishment then we seldom truly relish the complete experience of food.  It is only when we lose someone significant that we start to understand the depth and breadth of their impact within all the parts of our lives.  So I purport that we humans have a tendency to take ourselves for granted and that we do not truly understand our own hearts and minds very well.  Oh sure, we all carry around an image of ourselves within us but we are constantly amazed when that image is challenged by our own actions and reactions.  We are quite often our own worst enemies and so many of us are perplexed by this fact.

The great Chinese general and strategist, Sun Tzu well understood this important reality of our situation:

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle”

In our daily situation the enemy and our self are one and the same thing.  It is no wonder that we struggle so often with ourselves and with others.  Clearly, it is much to our advantage to overcome ourselves and thereby succeed in our lives.  To do this we need to truly understand and know ourselves. This is not an easy goal.  Since we drew breath we have been told who we are by others and we have likewise formed our own opinions over time.  We have great investment in these personas and identities.  We like to believe ourselves kind, generous or wise.  We enjoy such labels as being ‘a good father’, ‘a great friend’ or ‘a considerate lover.’  We have unquestionably accepted many titles on our journey through life, both complimentary and degrading.  And when our behaviour does not match a hard-held belief about ourselves then we experience confusion and frustration.

So we are thus confronted with the ancient adage to know ourselves.  To follow this directive takes action.   We must sincerely make the effort and take the time to get to know ourselves.  One needs sober and honest reflection on one’s own actions and reactions.  We are required to put aside the images that we have of ourselves and the identities that others have given to us.  Only then we can truly and honestly ask ourselves who and what we are.

I challenge you to reflect upon your life so far and the actions that you have taken.  Have you been cruel?  Have you been kind?  Were you thrifty or wasteful?  Gentle or harsh?  Look at your emotions and your thoughts.  Seek to be objective.  Neither defend nor criticize yourself.  Above all, try your utmost to be brutally honest but gentle with yourself.  In all likelihood what you learn will both amaze and terrify you.  You will need to gently accept your faults and humbly accept your virtues for both of these aspects define you in all your uniqueness.  You are both saint and sinner, light and dark.  This is okay.

Many reading here must wonder about the payoff of such efforts.  Self-reflection is often painful when we face dark truths about ourselves.  It can also be rewarding as we take inventory of virtues that we have been denying.  Above all, I believe that learning about ourselves helps us to become more effective and successful in our daily efforts.  We interact better with others when we understand who we truly are and who we are not.

From my own experience, I list here below but a few of the many benefits of following the sage advice to “Know thyself”:

• You are equally immune to flattery and insult.
• You accept yourself and in so doing accept all others as they are.
• You become invulnerable to coercion and corruption because you know what you need and why you need it.
• You see that your worst fears guard the pathways to your most passionate dreams.
• You realize that peace, love and happiness are not destinations.  They are the pathway.
• You understand your connection with your environment and source for all life.
• You develop the awareness that you cannot give without receiving or take without losing. 
• You know that hatred gives energy to the things that you hate and so you selfishly conserve your energy and forgive.
• You see the difference between knowledge and wisdom… and choose wisdom.
• You lose the words I’ll try, I think, I hope and I might.
• You use the words I will, I can, I have, I am, and I shall.
• You see with clarity your own folly, flaws, errors and failures and face them without excuse or self-pity.
• You acknowledge and accept the darkness within your own soul.
• Knowing your own short-comings and imperfections you extend gentleness, kindness and love towards the harsh cruelty, fear and selfishness of others.
• Humbly you accept your talents, gifts and virtues and take responsibility to act on them.
• You become free to love abundantly without restraint or conditions.
• Looking outwards you see this world with new eyes.  Nothing changes and yet everything does!

And lastly, you will be able to follow the last directives written at the Oracle of Delphi…

    Παις ων κοσμιος ισθι – As a child be well-behaved
    Ηβων εγκρατης  – As a youth be self-disciplined
    Μεσος δικαιος  – As of middle-age be just
    Πρεσβυτης ευλογος  – As an old man be sensible
    Τελευτων αλυπος  – On reaching the end be without sorrow

Playing the Game

Playing the Game
®Scott D. Wilson,P.Eng.

"Life is like a game of cards. The hand you are dealt is determinism; the way you play it is free will." -Jawaharlal Nehru

Have you ever had someone say to you "Get your head in the game!"? Well one way to look at life is through the model of a game. You roll the dice. You make your moves. And you have some fun in the playing. Life is full of both joy and tragedy. To focus on either side is folly. Today, I suggest that we get our head in the game.

Genetics, birth circumstances, upbringing, family, geography, and so many more factors, these are the hand that we are dealt. We did not choose the game. The game chose us. Ah, but then we have this thing called 'choice'! We have the power to choose what we will and will not entertain in our lives. We have the power of doing and not doing, being and not being. What we take away can be priceless: experience.

If we pause in our gameplay and reflect on the moves we made, how we played our cards and the outcomes that we achieved then we can begin to see the patterns of cause and effect within ourselves and in others. Results are not random. We are not victims of our circumstances. Our choices have profound effects on ourselves and our world. We can become better gamesmen. Life can be hacked. We can up our game. Wisdom does not come by chance or accident. It is intentional. It is a choice too.

So whether you are on fairway or off in the rough, on the court or on the sidelines planning your next move, remember that you can always choose to look back and learn from how you played so far. There is always chance to learn and improve. Life is always there to teach you the lessons that you need to succeed. Circumstances are not an excuse not to play or improve. Your choices will both empower you and define you. It is the experience that counts so let's make experience that we can count on! Have fun and remember that nobody gets out of this alive so play it all with gusto!

"You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else." -Albert Einstein

Cheers!

P.S. Although life can be considered a game we should be aware that it is not a competitive one against the all the rest of humanity. If played well then everyone should win!!!

Nickelback - When We Stand Together

Walking the Razor's Edge

Walking the Razor

© 2015 Scott D. Wilson,P.Eng.

 

“The pathway to salvation is as narrow and as difficult to walk as a razor's edge.” — W. Somerset Maugham from “The Razor's Edge.”

 

I need to confess, I have a love for a picture that bombed in the theatres back in 1984.  It was a movie starring Bill Murray in an adaption of Somerset Maugham’s “The Razor’s Edge.”  I enjoyed this film and its message when I first saw it back in 1984, and the cinematography is stunning.  I personally believed that it bombed because general audiences wanted to see the standard Bill Murray firing off jokes and making wisecracks.  This is not really that kind of film.  Somerset Maugham delves deeply into the worlds of materialism and spirituality.  To that end I believe that Bill Murray remained quite true to Maugham’s vision.  Unfortunately, a great deal of Maugham’s thoughts and conclusions are quite hard for many people to swallow.

I encourage folks to read Maugham’s book and to see the film.  The Razor’s Edge struggles with the concepts of good and evil, cause and consequence, actions and rewards.  I like the brutally honest answer that the main character delivers in a few short lines:

“When Piedmont died, I had to pay him back for my life. I found out there's another debt to pay — for the privilege of being alive. I thought Sophie was my reward for trying to live a good life. Uh uh. There is no payoff — not now.”

Western thinking, whether spiritual or physical, is frequently unconsciously caught up in the concept of investment and return.  We work hard expecting that effort to pay off.  Those who pursue spiritual matters usually expect to be rewarded with peace of mind and life with less conflict and strife.  We are always expecting the scales to balance in our lifetime.  Reality is far less predictable and reliable.  And so we alternately enjoy and suffer with the dualities of pleasure, pain, toil and reward, love and fear.  As Maugham’s character so aptly puts it, there is not necessarily a “payoff  — not now.”

This thought disappoints most of us.  If we make sacrifices now and try our best to be ‘good’ then there needs to be a reward, now, in this life.  While this may frequently be true it is certainly not a guarantee and we should realize this fact.  Additionally, we are mostly oblivious to the underlying selfishness of this expectation.  Many noble people did what was right and correct and it cost them everything, including their lives.  They were not expecting to reap the rewards of their actions.  They did not do right because it was of benefit to themselves.  They chose to act correctly because doing right transcends time and space.  Doing right serves something far greater than give and take, action and reward. These brave folks were aware that their actions would resonate out beyond their own personal existence into the future and onward towards eternity.

I can see how this thought may distress many people.  Justice seems cheated.  Those who reap do not seem to sow.  Similarly, this is offensive to rationalistic materialists enjoyment of science’s premise of cause and effect.  Meanwhile, spiritualists will generally take comfort in the belief of an afterlife for their rewards. I do not seek to clear this matter for either point of view.  Currently none can truly know with certainty what may or may not transcend their lifespan.  

I would hope that those with a rational scientific mindset would allow their egos to ebb and perform the mental calculations to see that doing right without personal reward can serve the future and their fellow man.  And the spiritualists should likewise let go of the mindset that is entitled to compensation.  I would not like to meet my Creator with the selfish expectation that my righteousness was motivated solely for my own benefit, avoiding punishment or to gain reward.  

When good happens were should rejoice and enjoy it.  When ill befalls this world we should mourn and take actions against it.  As long as time flies forward, both good and evil will remain temporary states.  My original quote comes from a monk seeking to caution Maugham’s main character.  Another wise One once similarly warned that “…it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of God!” The wealthy are most heavily invested in the concept of investment and return, and so they become robbed of an eternal perspective.

Life has taught me that it is of great importance to do what is good but it is of far greater importance to sincerely do it for the correct reasons.  Look neither for reward nor punishment.  Choose to do what is correct regardless of the outcome.  Free from the fear of penalties and the lure of compensation, if we do not get caught up in our own ego we might find that walking the razor’s edge to salvation is just that much easier. 

Why are you here?

Why are you here?

©2015 Scott D. Wilson,P.Eng.

 

Seriously, why are you here?  What is the point of your travels in this outer spiral arm of a Galaxy we call the Milky Way?  Sure, you were born here but that is mere circumstance.  Why do continue this ongoing adventure?  Are you like singer in the old Peggy Lee song “Is that all there is?” who is just hanging in because they simply don’t want to face the final disappointment of death?  Do you breathe out of habit or do you savour every miraculous heartbeat and every taste of life-sustaining air?

I see so many, day in and day out, struggling with addictions, bad habits, weight, and so much more.  The common factor for so many of them is the need for motivation and the will to follow through.  I may be wrong but I see that a large part of their problem is that they lack meaningful purpose in their life.  They simply do not know why they are here.  It is as if they expect to wake up one day from this tired existence and start living their real lives – the lives they were meant to be living.  This may in fact be partially true.

I can see why the Eastern religions and mysticism seek ‘enlightenment’ and ‘awakening.’  Like Neo in ‘The Matrix’ they want to see reality as it truly is and realize that their true identity is not what they have accepted since birth.  They want to awaken and see their true selves and those of the people and creations around them.  This is a noble quest.  It sets a foundation and provides a perspective for all that we are and all that we do.  For until you begin to truly understand yourself and start to know why you are here then you will continually struggle with motivation and willpower for all other pursuits.

For example, if you do not have a core purpose for living then what does it matter if you are thin or fat, healthy or sick, sane or crazy, wise or foolish?  Finding a purpose for life is not purely a spiritual pursuit.  Atheists are not immune to the need for a purposeful existence.  The only difference is the basis for the rational understanding of their unique purpose.

You are a combination of a rather unique set of 3.2 billion base pairs of DNA.  Scientifically and spiritually, you shall not pass this way again.  Even a clone will technically not be you, as it would be constrained to experience a completely different time and set of circumstances.   You belong here… to this time and place.  Accept that the universe has placed you where and when you are.  Whether it be the forces of evolution and circumstance or by divine intent, you came to be here today.

Accepting your place within time and space will allow you to look clearly at yourself and ask what role are you suited to play in the portion that has been allotted to you.  What are your talents?  What are your passions and interests?  What makes you come alive?  If these things are taking a back seat in your life then I suggest that you look at your priorities.  Because if you are not doing the things that bring enjoyment, meaning and fulfillment to your life then you won’t find much motivation to do all the other things that would otherwise bring health and other benefits to your existence.

Do not look to others to find out why you exist.  Their truths and meanings may have no bearing on you whatsoever.  Look inside and learn.  Look outside and see the possibilities, not the limitations.  Trust that you have been provided with a rational mind that can discover your own unique reasonable purpose.  Do not accept the realities that others have provided for you; they can limit your ability to see and understand.  When you are confused by life allow yourself to be puzzled and to ask “Why?”  Allow for awe and wonder. 

If you are having difficulties finding some kind of motivation I suggest that you put aside that struggle for now and instead ask yourself “Who am I?” Quietly allow the infinite number of answers to come to you.  Some will resonate more than others.  Dwell on those for they will help you to discover who you are and why you are here.  It will be a process.  Just as one does not go one day from a classroom to the pilot seat of an aircraft so too will the learning about yourself take gentle time and patience.  

I encourage you to discover your own reason for your existence.  From that answer will spring the ability and motivation for so much more.  Howard Thurman put it so eloquently:

“Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” 

I ask again, “Why are you here?”  I have provided some perspective and advice for one to begin to find an answer to this question.  Now I lastly ask, are you brave enough to try? 

Wonderlust

Wonderlust

©Scott D. Wilson 2015

I have said elsewhere that I was blessed to have found a friend that I can call my mentor. The times we have spent together have been golden and I have been forever enriched. One statement that my friend is fond of repeating is "Read it again for the first time."  It is a wonderful paradox, and it has been the source of so many incredible personal revelations. 

The Zen Buddhists and Japanese martial artists seek a state of mind called 'shoshin' meaning the "beginners's mind."  It refers to an attitude and view marked by eagerness, openness and without prejudice or preconception. This is the way an avid novice approaches a new activity or subject of study. It is a view full of limitless possibilities.

As we grow and experience life we accumulate knowledge and wisdom.  By necessity, we often must accept much of what comes to us as it is presented. We rarely question interpretations or understanding. For these reasons we also tend to accumulate prejudices and preconceptions. We believe that we are becoming experts about life and reality.

We think that we hold *the* truth.  By believing this error and accepting much of what others have told us we ironically grow in ignorance and folly.  We gradually lose our questioning mind and attitude. We similarly become more and more defensive of our views and truths because anything that contradicts them threatens our understanding and reveals our possible ignorance and error. Fear displaces wonder. 

There are other consequences. Sadly, we become increasingly jaded by life. It all becomes "Been there. Done that."  We lose the sense of amazement and excitement that children have when they experience something for the first time. It is this 'wonder' that is lacking so much in the lives of so many! We rob ourselves of the joy of learning.

The Zen folks have another term they use in conjunction with 'shoshin.' It is the phrase "new eyes."  They, like my mentor, encourage us to look at life again... for the first time. There is so much that we miss in this world because we do not indulge our natural sense of wonder and curiosity. I have discovered so much by simply pensively questioning my own views and the 'truths' of those who moulded my life... to again ask "Why?" and to ponder the possibilities.

And so I currently lust to regain much of my childlike sense of wonder!  I yearn to see this universe with new eyes. I seek to discover what I thought I knew. It is not always comfortable. That I will admit. It is often humbling, realizing how little I truly know and understand. I can tell you that it has been worth it though! You will find some irrefutable and unquestionable truths that will lead you on paths of amazement and discovery.  And thus I similarly encourage you all in your own wonderlust!